Turn over

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The state came through today. So financials are now in the May cycle, and nothing needs to be paid before the first (30th). Mad money is disengaged.

I ordered vanilla Piroulines, a 6 pack of tins, from Amazon. Due on Sunday. The price was right. My one final indulgence for the month.

6th anniversary of MOADB.

Reached 82°F this afternoon, so a long soak was partaken. Temperature will be dropping for a couple of days. We’ll get a hint from the Colorado cell that is freezing. Low 40s tonight. Wind is turning around as I type. Thermometer shaving off a few degrees. A few more and the windows will shut.

The sun has reached the office window in the late afternoon. It is summer, though the temps haven’t caught up yet. I may look for a shade or shutter for shade.

Spaghetti is gone. Now it’s brisket chili cheese dogs.

It took 5 days for the MBP to get from Shanghai to Incheon, and it’s scheduled to be here in another 5 days. I am assuming the first leg, ship, the second leg, plane.


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The days in between the money being spent and the rewards… Tap… tap…tap… I used the UPS shipping calculator, and it said that the laptop should be here Thursday, opposed to Apple’s Tuesday, a week tomorrow.

Turned out that the ethernet adaptor was sent to Brownsville. A new shipment is on the way, according to the seller.

Storage rent wet through today. Down to Texas being the tail dragger for the month, and that is because of federal changes requiring recalculations, but not for me.

No end of month flurry, like paying the internet bill, because mad money is history for the time being. I made a store run, because I was running low on cheddar, and the list had grown. Found an 8 oz chunk of Jarlsberg for $2.26. And french vanilla Piroulines. And suspenders were finally in stock. And clamp lamps. And shredded parmesan. It was a venture of unrequited rarities obtained.

There’s still a need to eat, as spaghetti and chili remain in the fridge, along with the smoked turkey. It’s hard to race with such filling items. A lot of unopened packages to follow (brats, chili cheese dogs, pastrami, tamales, and more) and I have forgone alternatives such as fried chicken, fajita chicken tacos, pizza, etc, that have caught my eye in the freezer. And then there have been the rib eyes calling out to me. *sigh*

My left hand is still a victim of overly ambitious jamming, pads and fingers. I have been treating the pads with coconut oil. The arnica treatments have stopped, but the ibuprofen hasn’t.

In the low 70s today. Windows are open. Forecast says low 80s tomorrow.


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The MBP has shipped. No estimation of delivery date yet, as it needs to cross the ocean first.

Made the jam, it was held indoors. There wasn’t much of a crowd, thanks to the weather. But it was fun, I played a fairly non-standard set, and there was a jam party next door afterwards. My voice is starting to return, but it’s not there yet. The evening left me ibuprofen sore, mostly furniture induced. Brought home a tub of brisket chili.

I didn’t eat a whole lot yesterday. No spaghetti made. I’m not going hungry, just the low end of the cycle. Avocado still needs a little time.

The rain yesterday came with marble size hail. Myka was freaked, and I had to keep reassuring her that everything was okay until it passed.

Looks like a quiet weekend.


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That was the sound of my bank account taking a hit this morning after Apple got through with it. Good news, the transaction went through with my pampering and persistence. The MBP is preparing to ship. Stimulus well spent.

And the storage rent was paid too. Last hit of the month. The rest will be trivial, mad money is history for a while.

Crossing the Rubicon, all before breakfast.

Hoping the jam happens tonight. Weather forecast is improving for the time slot. I have been practicing, polishing up a few songs from years past.

Only chore is last night’s sketti dishes, all well rinsed.

Day after

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I said I wasn’t going to spend any more money yesterday, but then I decided on a USB-c male to RJ45 female, so I can ethernet the laptop to the internet. I’ll have USB-c to USB-3 hub (4), USB-c to lightning (iPad), and USB-c to ethernet. That should cover the four ports, given the charger.

They haven’t charged the bank account, nor do I expect them to until they ship. So buyer’s remorse hasn’t really set in yet. At least there is an adequate cushion.

Still haven’t been up to replacing the brake cylinder. It hasn’t been leaking for a few days. But then I haven’t driven it since Friday.

Made spaghetti sauce last night, once the sloppy joes were gone. Freezer has been supplying variety, nothing in the fridge is open.

Not a lot going on. It’s been a do nothing day, giving my brain time to adjust to the purchase. 4.5 years in the making is pretty monumental. It’s not hitting me yet, since nothing has changed yet. Yet. No small chore, downloading, installing, configuring, learning curve, making it mine.

Windows stayed open all night.

MBP 16″

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Not much has changed in the last three days. I made a store run on Friday at 5 pm, but the shopping gods had my back, prime parking spots, no lines at check outs, green lights, and I even missed the line of cars on the 290 feeder waiting to get into McDonald’s drive thru. I was blessed.

Ground chuck for sloppy joes and spaghetti, and a little for the freezer. I finished the jambalaya, so it’s time to cook.

Today was cool enough for the brake cylinder replacement, but it was too windy, too much dust stirring. At least the air was leaked out of the line, self-bleeding. Maybe tomorrow. It’s not at the point of failure yet.

So I’m pretty much sitting it out. No laptop yet. Bank will be callable on Monday. Letting the balance sit there a few days for my perusal, before the bottom drops out.

Windows are open more than they’re shut. A good time for a dose of spring fever.

Is today different?

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It doesn’t feel like it. Differences from yesterday:

  1. Stimulus deposit cleared the bank and is available.
  2. It’s been two weeks since the second vaccination.
  3. The brake cylinders are on their way here, overnighted.
  4. There are no voice mails showing on my phone.
  5. I didn’t have chicken fajita tacos for lunch.
  6. It’s not Tuesday.

Similarities and continuities.

  1. It will be overcast in the 80s.
  2. I haven’t been to a store.
  3. I had flautas for breakfast.

Okay, I see a trend. Everything that is different is somewhere or somewhen else. Except the tacos. I haven’t had lunch yet, probably a tamale. That means that I am thinking small today. I made it as far as the street to bring in the trash bin. But by and large, my consciousness of the world today has been contained in less than 100 feet square. I attribute that to lack of ambition.

Perhaps lack of ambition is not correct. I would be more prone to classify it as a shift in paradigm. I have finally reached the point where a new MBP is in reach. Years of focused tension no longer have a handle. But it’s a little like enlightenment. With: haul water, chop wood. Without: haul water, chop wood. The new workhorse MBP is not here in front of me to apply the brakes and refocus.

And the brakes are still not secured. Maybe tomorrow. I still have decisions to make there, here or a shop…

But I have reached CDC’s max protection for COVID-19. I can officially hug again. No one has hugged me yet, but then no one has been around to hug me today. I’m not taking that personally.

Myka, almost 7 years old, hogging the LZB.

CDC magic number

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14 days after the second injection. No more interpolating efficacy and efficiency, I’m there tomorrow. Whew. The side effects have finally abated, or at least my attributing them to my aches and pains.

Tomorrow is the EIP3 deposit clearing the bank. Nothing stopping the MacBook Pro except my plunge and a call to the bank to clear the amount on the credit card. Adieu, obsolescence. And a large chunk of change…

Not much else going on. A quick store run yesterday, bread, flautas, a few sundries.

Breaking into a string of 80s for highs and 60s for lows. Sleeves are falling to the wayside, at least during the day. The AC could see its first firing of the season this week as it approaches 90°F. Windows open every day from here on.

Practicing three songs for the Pioneer jams, each for other people. No telling when I’ll need to sing them. But they’ve all gathered a little rust.

Passenger rear brake cylinder is leaking. *sigh*

Blue bonnets, flox, and yellow daisies.


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Finally got the jambalaya on the stove. Lots of other things delayed it. Chores, avocado spud and ensuing nap, other naps, staring out the window after naps, etc.

I got the configuration of the 16″ MacBook Pro set. I decided I didn’t need to spend the extra $400 for 64G of RAM when 32G would do. Going over $4k for the package just isn’t necessary, when $3.6k (includes sales tax) will handle my needs with a comfortable margin. The stimulus was posted to the bank today, it will clear Wednesday the 7th. Farewell to mad money for a while. I will get to be frugal for a while. Yeah!

Not happy with AT&T over the mandatory 5G upgrade, which will kill the daily use schedule and demand a flat monthly charge, a minimum of $30. That is quite a hike from $8/mo. I need to check my internet plan and see if I can do better with a bundle. Also refund for my current plan. I have time, until June for current billing, February for the final obsolescence. 14 voice mails from numbers I don’t recognize that I’m ignoring.

No windows today, it stayed just below threshold this afternoon, a big rain cloud keeping the temps down. Not a whole lot of rain, though. Starting tomorrow, it will be a rare day that they’re not open.

Weekends… the wastelands of turistas, the void in the theater, the unanchored zone.

Still a tad achey, slows me a little, and the tiredness slows me a little more. Comes with the territory. But I can still dazzle. So I can’t complain too much. I think the vaccination side effects have finally worn off. It’s just me and the life I’ve led.

Be chickin’ ya

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Got a 20 piece box (two 10 piece boxes, actually) from Church’s. 18 pieces went in the freezer, as did the bags of unpulled pork. With the four other pieces of Church’s and four pieces of Popeye’s, I am uncharacteristically well stocked on fried chicken. Except for roasted chicken quarters, the freezer is well balanced in its fullness.

Jambalaya is in the starting phases of being cooked. Prepping the chicken quarters is next.

Made a store run today, it was busy enough to get the police directing pre-holiday traffic. Fortunately I didn’t need a whole lot, I wasn’t particularly in the mood. I’m well stocked for the weekend. Coconut cream pie thawing in the fridge. Fresh produce, a couple of small avocados.

Windows managed to be opened today. I expect the trend to continue.

Birds or squirrels are raiding the oat grass seeds from the newly planted trays.

Done, unpulled

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Done, unpulled.


Done, removed, unpulled.

3:30 pm, done. Bags in the fridge. 11.5 hours after it started, the last washed pot is in the drying rack. Cycle complete, except the freezing, and that can wait until the freezer gets rearranged, the next phase in the kitchen. Chicken, pork tenderloin, shrimp, and scallops have started thawing for jambalaya and to make room in the freezer.

Not sure about the jam tonight, how cool it might be, the wind, etc. Time will tell. I need to eat. I haven’t had anything but a few small snacks today.

Made the jam session, though it was fairly low key and on the cool side, but fun enough to stay for three hours. I put the jambalaya ingredients in the fridge before they thawed, so I may wait until tomorrow for that. On the tired side.

Out like a clam

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Been spending the last of the month at home. Got all the chores done. An occasional odd sensation, mostly lymph nodes complaining, a little tiredness, a tinge of headache, lingering from the vaccination. But that’s mostly behind me. Overall, I’m doing well.

An RV showed up out front last night. Not mine. I hope it doesn’t present a trash pickup problem.

It seems that my stimulus deposit will happen this coming weekend and clear a week from now, on the 7th. That is okay by me. Paycheck clears after midnight. In good shape financially.

I plan on getting the Boston butt slow cooked today. Haven’t started yet but I’m not in a hurry. Doesn’t take a lot of effort to rub the roast, spice the broth, and chop up an onion. It will take more work to rearrange the freezer for it and package it for freezing. Jambalaya will be part of the rearranging (thawing). I will be getting more fried chicken from Church’s, using a coupon before it expires. That will top off the freezer.

The wind is turning around to the north and picking up, the arrival of the front that will drop temps for the next three days. After that, we’ll be seeing consistent 80s. I got the house closed up while it was still warm. Haven’t layered up yet, but otherwise I’m set. Had a long soak yesterday in prep, and the laundry done. This should be the last cool spell for some time, like September or October.


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Just got back from a store run that capped a do nothing weekend. I killed the mad money for quite some time, in all likelihood. I got a Craftsman ratcheting screwdriver that uses drill tips (flat, phillips, torx, allen, square, etc). A handy tool when a drill is a little too bulky. It has an extending socket for variable length, and a left/locked/right ratchet. A handy tool, and I already have a bunch of tips to go with the 24 that came with it.

I also got some magnets to hold my receipt bag against the filing cabinet. They are magnitudes stronger than the ones that were on it (chip bag clips). Well worth the $2.50 I paid. The total put me three dollars under limit.

I also got a 9.8 lb Boston butt. I was out of pulled pork in the freezer. I forewent the pork loin and ground chuck, as I already have sufficient pork tenderloin and chuck in the freezer. So that takes care of the store runs and bills for the rest of the month (3 days).

Made the tuna mac, much to Myka’s delight. So it’s that and risotto as the primaries. Plenty of secondary options. Pulled pork and jambalaya are approaching. I found a Church’s chicken coupon page that expires April 4th. *sigh* As if I need more fried chicken.

I have pretty much gotten over the odd sensations from the second vaccination, though there will be a stray one here or there, mostly respiratory. I have been using arnica on the shoulders and knees, and it has helped considerably. They have both been very dense, like I’ve been juggling truck tires while squat dancing for Olympic training.

There was a high temp on Saturday of 83°F. Today, it managed 70°F. More ping pong this coming week.

Friday night

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10 pm, 77°F, windows open. A nice day.

However, the side effects of the vaccination still linger slightly. Not intense, but still there. I broke down this afternoon and used ibuprofen, about 44 hours after the onset of the side effects, about 53 hours after the injection. I am slowly coming around.

The second injection invokes the immune response of the first injection, which is why it’s more intense. And the stronger the immune system, the stronger the response. So I’m still pretty ornery.

Made risotto tonight. I still have half a cup of milk left. Tuna mac, maybe. Myka would be thrilled with TJ. Still have a serving of gravy left. Still haven’t thought sufficiently about the Boston butt and pork loin. I’ll get around to it in the next four days, before the sale ends.

Been a sit around home day, eating and sleeping. I had no reason to leave the premises. Chores are done. (I have a pot to wash, after it soaks a little longer.) Just a hang around and let it wear off kind of day.


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The wildflowers are out. It’s not a strong year. While the flowers are there to a fairly decent degree, the weeds got a head start on them. So the display is not prime, sort of mixed in with the green. But it’s refreshing. It’s spring.

It was refreshing to get out of the house after a night of vaccine side effects. Mix grr and ugh, and it’s pretty close. I slept as much as I could, fewer hours to experience it. It’s not so much stamina as it is focus that is suffering. I can do chores, but playing music is not in the cards. It’s not dire, but it’s intense and unavoidable when awake. Muscle aches, a mild headache, etc. The worst was the organ responses, throat and glands, trachea, lungs, etc, but they only lasted a few minutes and went away. I still have one kicking immune system. I’ll survive.

Myka nipped my arm last night and is feles non grata. She is having a hard time accepting that. I was wearing a denim shirt, so no blood. I don’t want to be grouchy, but she isn’t leaving me much room to be otherwise. Brat.

The jury is still out on the jam tonight. I’m not in a musical mood now. But that could change.

Windows are open, sunny, mid 70s, gentle breeze.

Fajita chicken tacos for lunch.

I made the jam and performed about two and a half hours. My voice was rather weak, both from lack of use and from the vaccination. There were six leaders, though not at once. But it allowed me to rest my voice between songs and extend my session. But I did get asked, “Got one?” So that has been checked off my list.

My next door neighbor was there. He’s a good singer, a solid tenor. I won’t have to hold back singing now, to get my voice back in shape. Lynn was there as well, good seeing and playing with her. And several of the regulars were there. So plenty of familiar faces.

Next jam is a week away. I will have to practice.

Twice jabbed, once spry

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Got my second vaccination today. The first time took two hours, due to doubling up for a make up date from the freeze. Today’s took 30 minutes, including the 15 minute reaction wait. No negative reaction yet, though I can definitely feel it working.

I did some reading on Moderna and the variants. The base injection handles the UK and US variants almost as well as the original. The South African and Brazilian are not handled as well (but better than most flu shots), but it prevents severe illness and death. However, there are only three of the SA and two of the B verified in the state of Texas. Not enough to even consider at this point. So I consider myself protected for the nonce. (Emphasis on “nonce”.) I can return to a social life.

I sent a scan of the CDC card to my primary, for their records, as requested. That closes the red tape for the month. (Unless I get my stimulus deposit, and that one requires no effort on my part, for now.)

Store run, rounding out the selection. Flautas was the main item, smoked turkey, and Myka got fresh treats. It was mostly munchies, though. I didn’t make any decisions about the pork loin, Boston butt, or ground chuck yet. (And unrelated to protein…) Mad money is almost gone.

Laundry, ice bin, and recycling are the only chores for today. Windows are open, low 70s, but it’s overcast. It should warm to upper 70s this afternoon. Looks like a pretty lazy afternoon.

The blue bonnets were popping along the road to the fairgrounds today. I might make a run out Industrial and see how they’re doing. Not much of the other flowers yet, but they will come around in time.

I am ready to shift my efforts from recovery to revelry. The last five weeks have been demanding. If I put even a fraction of that effort into partying, I will be making up for the last year in style. And it will be self-inflicted.

The side effects are a bit more pronounced after the second injection, mostly aches and fatigue. The unusual part is the spot aches, lungs, trachea, throat and glands, liver, lymph nodes. They happen for a couple of minutes and then go away. And the generally sore parts of my body tend to be the parts that were sore from working on the truck or are often sore from day to day, shoulders, arms, thighs, knees. No fever yet, though I do at times feel a tad chilled. But instead of feverish, it’s chilled, cold hands, other exposed places to drafts. While I’m not inclined to leave the house like this, I’m capable of doing whatever needs doing.

But this is a good thing, as it’s a sign that the first dose was effective in creating the antibody generation effect. That is quite reassuring. So I’ll endure them, let them run their course. Hopefully they will have subsided by tomorrow evening’s jam session.

In reg

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The truck was inspected and registered today. The sticker is on the windshield.

Hubba hubba hubba hubba hubba. A beautiful day for it. Blue sky, 77°F, mild breeze, windows open. Wildflowers are starting to crank it up.

Second vaccination tomorrow morning. I do not want to miss that.

A nice soak, put the truck biz behind me. Laundry, trash tonight. Rest of the chores are done.

HEB put pork loin and Boston butt on sale for $1/lb. Ground chuck, $2.77. How dare they? They have to know that I’m low on all three and don’t have room for 25 lbs in the freezer. The nerve! And here I was about to make a store run.

Boil and bubble

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I cooked today. Okay, okay, it was just sausage gravy, but it was cooking. More to come, now that I have broken the chain. Washing dishes will require momentum.

It was a moist day, so I didn’t bleed the brakes. I still have ample time. Tomorrow’s weather looks promising.

It wasn’t a totally lazy day, but it was no barn burner. Planted a new tray of oat grass. The one I planted last week has sprouted. I should be able to harvest by the end of the week. Chores are done (except dishes).

Windows were open, around 73°F, a modest breeze from the south.

A busy week ahead. Bleed brakes, inspect truck, truck registration, recycling, second vaccination, jam at the Pioneer. And that is the short list.

Hammer and dip

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I went to Lowe’s twice today, to get 2 cans of Plasti Dip and 2 hammers (14″ 22 oz deluxe straight claw and 14″ 4 lb blunt). The dip is for pliers and crescent wrenches, and a screwdriver or two. The hammers are for when I’ll need a specialty hammer. Don’t ask me when. I decided that hand tool upgrades would be a good place for the last month of mad money.

I also just went and got a script refill, making it the third venture for the day. I am having a hard time pin pointing the last time that I drove from the house to at least a mile away, for three times during a single span of daylight. At least a year. The blown radiator hose on the truck was only twice, and the second time wasn’t a mile away. Life is indeed changing.

Cornbread, chicken fajita, butter, pastrami, etc. Grocery run tied to the first venture, half a dozen items. I will get back to cooking one of these days. Won’t be long. But I will do well in the meantime.

I am focused on bleeding the brakes and inspecting the truck tomorrow. Maybe even getting the registration sticker. I’ve spent enough time and energy on the truck, I want it behind me. The driving has taught me a number of things about the truck, and it’s ready to roll, as soon as the brakes are firmer. It’s starting perfectly in less than a second. It handles well. It’s nominal.

The weather forecast is looking better for Wednesday morning. Forecast says 0.03″ of rain. That will not muddy the field at the fairgrounds. Afternoon is a different story, but I’ll be gone by then. I hope it holds. I don’t want a mudfest for my second vaccination.

Windows have been open most of the day, mid 70s. Lovely spring day.

Tidy Truck™

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I still haven’t given the brakes the final bleed, though I’m not ruling out today. There is still a few hours of daylight left. But my big achievement of the day was to arrange the contents of the back of the pickup, including the toolbox. I even got the wrenches sorted by descending size. I got all the fluids nice and properly packed, easily accessible. It’s the way it should be.

I found my Klein needle nose pliers, buried down in the toolbox, though they need new grips. I guess I’ll get some handle dip. I have four pliers that could use it, plus some crescents. I’m avoiding a store run today, even though I have a few things on the list. None are essential. It’s Saturday.

I’m starting to come around. I haven’t been totally lazy, but I’ve been avoiding high energy expenditures. I’ve been sleeping without hesitation (well, a couple of Myka based hesitations). Shoulders are still a little sore, but not badly.

I’ll get around to cooking eventually.


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The 1/4″ tubing I got was too large, so I got some 3/16″ today, along with a new pair of heavy needle nose pliers. I have no idea what happened to my Kleins from days begone. I might bleed the brakes today, if I feel like it. I might, might not. There is always tomorrow. I have plenty of time to spare.

Airport says 66°F, thermometer in the window says 70°F. It’s sunny, breezy. The windows are open. Myka is pleased.

Today is a lazy day, despite the store run. Snoozed a lot while it was cool.

Got gas to top off the tank. I selected regular, it gave me super at 50¢/gal extra. At least it was only 5 gallons.


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I got a set (7) of metric wrenches today. I have plenty of metric sockets, but I never replaced the metric wrenches from back in the day when they sprouted legs. I may never use them, considering how long I went without them, but they’re there if needed. I also got some 1/4″ vinyl tubing for the final bleed of the brakes.

Before hand, I open bled the brakes. They stop solid before the pedal hits the floor, with room for my other foot beneath the pedal. That will pass inspection, but I want better. I am done for inspection, I could take it in tomorrow, but I want the truck a little better. I have plenty of time. But I will probably try to have it inspected and registered this week or first of next week if I get too lazy.

All my bills have registered on my bank account. Nothing is left to add to it except the stimulus, but it looks like it will be a bit later, TBD from what I’ve read. No hurry.

I was going to get gas, but the stations were either sold out or had lines preventing access. No hurry, 4 – 5 gallons maybe. I added the injector cleaner and wanted to top it off for that.

I got some Church’s spicy and spicy rice on the way home. I’d been thinking about it. 2 pieces in me, 2 in the fridge, 6 in the freezer. I still have 4 pieces of Popeye’s in the freezer.

Temperature is dropping. Edged on 80°F today, but it’s cooling slowly, 72°F near sunset. It will be 60s/40s for the rest of the week/weekend.

Bluebonnets are popping up in the yard across the street. The truck is in shape for a scenic cruise.


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Today is the day I intend to finally end a two year of procrastination and rebuild the shifter.

I took Sunday and Monday off to build steam after last week’s endeavors. It was needed R&R. The body is in much better shape, though there are still minor aches and pains across the upper back from tire juggling. I haven’t returned to cooking yet, but I’m focusing my physical efforts on getting the truck inspected.

There is a movement afoot to start Music School again for those of us who have been vaccinated.

Still no sign of the stimulus deposit yet. But I have traditionally been later in the list, and the IRS has been swamped with numerous issues during tax season. Not in a big hurry, as long as it gets here.

It’s definitely spring. The windows stayed open all night, 70s and 80s during sunlight hours. New green is starting to show. I planted a new tray of oat grass seed for Myka, as the ones I started in September are turning spotty brown as it starts to go to seed.

Done, after two years hesitation. I only made two mistakes that were reversible without harm. And I got there. Getting the three allen bolts out with a hammer and chisel was the tough part. Now I have a new habit to learn.

All the old parts removed.

Now trash to the curb and I’m done for the day. I may bleed the brake tomorrow, either here or take it in. I could take it out for a spin. Wouldn’t hurt to blow out the injectors.


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I am all warn out. Juggling tires is something most people my age leave to others, as was evident by the roadside assistance out in front of the house today. I went out afterward and gave the driver-front lugs a post spin tightening, despite the ache across my shoulder blades from juggling that same tire multiple times.

First day of DST. I just adjusted the clock on the microwave, 13 hours late. It is indeed a lazy day, one well deserved. Besides, it’s 60°F and was raining earlier, 20°F cooler than yesterday. Not particularly inspiring, even if I wasn’t feeling the effort of the previous weeks.

No sign of the stimulus deposit yet, but it’s still early and not likely to clear until mid-week. I still have the truck on my mind. Bleed, shifter, tire, inspection. I still have a couple weeks.

Pulled pork in the kitchen sink thawing. Planning on sausage gravy today, if I can get it going.

Tempted to go get the core deposit back on the caliper, just for the sake of going somewhere. Getting out of the house after being homebound for a month is a strong urge. Several times, I was aware that nothing is on the shopping list.